It was a TV show that defined a generation. My generation. I used to like Friends until they tried to hook Joey up with Rachel. Those two had the social chemistry of Perez Hilton and Pat Robertson. It was uncomfortable and, to me, ultimately unwatchable. I also remember an episode where Monica is curiously approving when she discovers that her husband Chandler is watching porn. I remember wondering "will hundreds of thousands of guys and girls who love this show now think its
cute when they discover their partner is watching porn?" This really bugged me and it was hard for me to watch Friends the same way. Chanica's porn kinda ruined it for me. But, if I'm going to start bagging shows that have sketchy solutions to sketchy situations- then I'm going have to stop watching TV altogether. So, with remote in hand, I press on...
Talk about seriously digressing...the point of this entry is not a TV show. I'd rather talk about actual, real-life, I-want-better-for-you-than-for-me friends. You see, I think we are, at times, really confused about what "friendship" means. The book of Proverbs says "He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harms" and then a few verses later "...A righteous man is cautious in friendship, but the way of the wicked leads them astray" (Prov 13:20 & 26.)
Now, far-be-it-from-me to get all preachy on you, but I think we all have had people in our lives that we'd classify as "friends" that have been both "fools" and "led us astray" in some of our choices. I'm sure we've actually been those people, too. Maybe often. But friends, that is not "friendship." I am certain that we have bonded with people over poor decisions fueled with insecurity and laced with peer-pressure. Never forget:
friends free us from our insecurities they don't fuel them. They drag us away from danger- they don't hold our hand and walk with us into it. The fact is, we mistake a lot of things for authentic friendship.
Now my confession: I have frequently been a crappy friend. It's true. I have stood silently while I watched my friends make bad decisions. There might've even been a time or two I even encouraged them. I'm certain that insecurity, and not love, was guiding me. But, I knew better. And, so did you.
So, how can you be a good friend? Well, I love the passage in Proverbs 17 that declares "as iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another." Do your friends sharpen you? Do you sharpen them? If not, regardless of how well you know these people, true friendship isn't going on. You've just been co-existing, making memories, fueling insecurities, and missing the point, entirely.
So start sharpening some people. A good start would be inviting someone that needs purpose, direction, redemption, and love to The Tavern Church
THIS Sunday night at 7:45 at the City Tavern in downtown Dallas. It's a great way to show how much you love someone...by holding their hand and walking away from the fires of insecurity- and into an encounter with Christ.
It's super casual. No pressure. No dress code. The music is incredible (and I'm a music snob- so believe me.) Grab a beer. Hear the Word. Feel the love. Be a friend.
